Originally published on Relationship Counselling Perth

Not everyone respects monogamy. Though adultery is also not something that everyone likes getting involved in, it somehow does happen.

Monogamy certainly is the right way for the society, but sadly, with so many British adults involved in affairs, it certainly is not the usual reality. Men commonly get involved with their office colleagues, while women get into a relationship with their male friends.

But why is it that so many people end up cheating?

On speaking to relationship counselor Dee Holmes about the causes behind partners going astray, the following triggers were discovered.

1. Owing to resentment

Holmes stated that one of the reasons why people cheat is because of resentment. When one person does not give their partner the desired attention, and/or are always busy working, then the partner can try to get control in their relationship by getting involved in an adulterous relationship. This move could just be because the partner craves attention, and there is no proper communication between the two partners.

2. Not satisfied sexually

When a couple is having problems in their bedroom or is not involved in regular sex then one of them may end up seeking satisfaction somewhere else. This can be a very common cause, and as explained by Holmes, can be linked with other triggers like feeling neglected.

3. Just to spice things up

Some people cheat just because they want to spice up their relationship. This happens when one partner has become bored of the relationship and will go to any extent to ignite that passion, even get involved in adultery.

4. Feeling insecure

Yet another reason why people end up getting involved in adultery is owing to lack of self-esteem. Holmes explained that this could result due to various factors like being insecure about their career, their body, or even age. Many people cheat because they want to feel young again. They are in search of younger partners so that they themselves can feel young, something they have not been feeling after being married for so long.

5. Out of habit

Some people do not respect the idea of monogamy at all and will keep cheating as long as they can. This becomes a part of their habit.

Though people involved in adultery do try to mend ways, they find it difficult to stick to just one person forever. This, as Holmes explains, can be due to various reasons like addiction to sex, commitment problems, attachment issues, and so on. No matter what the reason is, the fact is there are some people who will just not give up on their philandering habits ever, and will rather always enjoy the same.


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